


Secret Keepers

by Polkat (aralias)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: April Showers 2015, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-06-23
Updated: 2003-06-23
Packaged: 2018-03-20 23:18:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3668886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aralias/pseuds/Polkat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Marauders: Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs. The story of the first death, the last betrayal and the story of a man who cradled the body of his best friend in his arms, knowing he'd have to run for his life as soon as anyone else found out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Choice

**Author's Note:**

> Uploading old fic for April Showers 2015. All spelling/grammar errors left as originally posted.

"I trust Sirius with my life."

"And you will not reconsider?"

The dark head shook. "He's more than my best friend, Albus, he's like a brother."

The old wizard sank into his chair and gazed across at the youth opposite him a quiet despair in his eyes. James Potter was no longer a child. He was no longer the arrogant boy sent to his office by Professor McGonagall after causing havoc in her class, transfiguring a room of tables into mice; leaving the tea cups they were supposed to be changing, untouched.

"You can't dictate how I choose to live my life any more, I'm not your student now."

Dumbledore's mouth twitched into a smile. "If I recall correctly you listened to me even less when you were a student."

James had the decency to blush. "I'm sorry, that was out of order."

The headmaster sighed. "No, it was the truth. I cannot make your decisions for you, and if I could I would not."

Relieved Potter flopped into the chair opposite him, and pushed his hair back from his face. Dumbledore grinned, as the man became the boy once more. James stuck his tongue out and smoothed his hair back down, as if reading the other's thoughts. "I would've been honoured to have you as my secret keeper…" Dumbledore waved it aside.

"If we start suspecting our friends then Lord Voldemort has already won. Sirius has your trust; therefore he has mine." He smiled again. "I suppose I have never totally forgiven him for bewitching all my socks pink in his second year."

James stopped laughing. "Thank you for understanding," he added quietly.

"It's not about understanding.  _Voldemort_  is out looking for you James."

"I know."

"I have already warned Frank and Alice, they've gone into hiding. Is it too much to ask that you and Sirius lie low for a while?"

James smiled widely and waved his hand flippantly. "Of cour…"

"Don't just agree!" Dumbledore yelled and James' hazel eyes widened in shock. "You have to mean it this time. This is no longer a game that we can win. I don't want either of you playing the hero again. The Order cannot afford to lose you!" The anger subsided from his face and he suddenly looked very old and very tired. " _I_  cannot afford to lose you, any of you.

"I promise." He rose and moved to the door. "Don't worry Albus, we'll stay hidden."

"Just stay alive."

Sirius Black stared moodily at the ceiling of his muggle hotel room. It had been two weeks now since he had become the Potters secret keeper and to be quite frank he was bored rigid. Idly he picked up the thing Lily had assured him was called a remod control and pointed it dubiously at the fellyvision. Nothing happened. He tried pressing some of the grey blastick buttons but the screen remained blank. Irritated he fumbled for his wand and prodded the machine with it until a fuzzy black and white picture appeared on it: two muggles were having an argument. He tapped it again and they disappeared to be replaced with a large black dog. He was momentarily comforted until the dog started prancing around and balancing on top of a ball. Was there nothing worth watching on this stupid thing? He flicked the wand again, different pictures flashed before his eyes, momentary seconds of dialogue formed discordant sentences. Frustrated he turned it back off and flung himself back on the bed, face down into the cheep smelling sheets, hands dangling limply off the sides. Inside he knew he was perhaps the only thing standing between Voldemort and his best friends but it was much easier to believe he was sitting here, being useless while others were out fighting the dark lord. Remus had visited earlier that week but it was full moon tonight and Sirius' hopes were not high for another visit, his friend was probably locked up even now under the Shrieking Shack. He suppressed a wave of guilt; at least he still had his mind. It wasn't as if Peter couldn't have visited though.

He felt like screaming with frustration. Shut off from the wizarding world during its biggest crisis… it was almost unbearable. He rolled over and missed the end of the narrow bed, falling unceremoniously onto the floor. Loud cursing filled the air until he realised he couldn't be bothered to swear any more and just lay, staring morosely under his bed.

He had forgotten how long he had been lying there when he spotted the mirror lying under a pile of screwed up shirts near one of the legs. He gripped it eagerly and looked into it. "James Potter." His handsome face stared back at him for a moment and then materialised into the beaming image of his best friend. "Padfoot!"

Sirius grinned back and picked himself off the floor and sat back on the bed. "How are you?"

"Great. I was wondering how long it'd take you to get so bored you remembered the mirrors. I've been trying to contact you for ages but the underside of your bed wasn't very interesting so I stopped after a while."

Sirius grimaced slightly. "To be honest I didn't so much remember the mirror."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I fell off the bed and there it was."

James' laugh filled the small room "you fool" and Sirius heart rose as he joined in.

Eventually they stopped long enough for James to ask curiously "Is this your room?"

"Yer…" Sirius waved the mirror round it briefly. "Like a fricking palace isn't it?"

Prongs looked faintly uneasy. "It's very nice."

"It's a sty."

"Feels almost like home then, huh?"

" _You_  were the messy one in our relationship."

"I  _was_?" James' adopted a look of mock injury and a high pitched voice. "You… mean… it's… over?"

"'Fraid so," Sirius replied straight-faced. "We're just not right for each other."

"But… Siry-poo… I thought you… you said you'd… love me for…"

"James?"

"Lily… I," he coughed and his voice resumed its normal pitch. "Lily…I was er… just talking to-"

"Siry-poo wasn't it?" She had obviously seized the mirror because soon he was staring at the amused face of a beautiful woman rather than his friend's bad impression of one. She raised a delicate eyebrow. "I didn't realise you were so close."

He rearranged his features into what he hoped was a pacifying and innocent expression. "Hiya Lils."

Her lips flickered. "Sirius please stop attempting to seduce my husband, he's bad enough as it is."

He grinned as James' protestations filled the background. "If it makes you feel better Lily, I was in the process of dumping him. You can have the arrogant buffoon right back."

" _I'm_  a buffoon?" James yelled out of sight. "Who just fell off their own bed?"

"I notice you didn't object to arrogant." Lily sighed. "Honestly it's like the two of you never left school."

"I know, great isn't it?"

A baby screamed in the background and Lily turned to James, "go get Harry will you?"

The shrieking stopped as James carried his son back into the room and positioned him in front of the mirror. "Say hello to your godfather, Harry."

"Hello Uncle Sirius," came James' voice from behind the child and one podgy hand waved at him, enclosed in James' larger fingers.

"Heya Harry," Sirius smiled. "Did you know you sound exactly like your father?"

"I do? That's wonderful; handsome devil, fiercesomely intelligent…"

"Child protégée huh?"

"Takes after his old man."

"…brave…"

"James," Lily's reproving voice broke into " _Harry's"_  description of his father's virtues.

"Sorry, I'm just trying to bring light to Black's isolation."

"By talking about how wonderful you are?"

"Well it cheers  _me_  up."

"You shouldn't even be talking in the first place, don't you remember what Dumbledore said? Sirius has to stay in isolation so Voldemort can't track him"

Prongs turned a faint shade of green and tried to smile reassuringly "…Well I'm sure he was just exaggerating…"

Her voice started rising. "I cannot believe you forgot!"

"I didn't forget Lily…"

"So what you're saying is you  _want_  the Death Eaters to swoop down on us?" she screamed.

There was a loud crack out in the hallway and Sirius' head swung quickly towards the door. "Or on me…"

Harry started crying once more.

"What?" James voice was anxious and hard; it contained no hint of the laughter of before.

"They know I'm here. Prongs I'll meet you at Clouds in two cycles. Do you understand?"

James nodded once and disappeared from the mirror.


	2. Distraction

A long, slow howl filled the still night air.

The dog's ears prickled and its pace quickened. Deep beneath the Shrieking Shack the werewolf moaned again.

"At last."

The dog changed back into a man and glared back up into James Potter's worried face. "I was a little busy. Next time  _I'll_  be the one the Dark Lord's after and  _you_  can run as fast as you can away from his Death Eaters."

"You said two hours. It's been three and a half."

"I didn't anticipate… look it doesn't matter. I'm here now."

Lupin bayed again.

" _Why_  are we here Padfoot?"

Sirius looked faintly surprised, "to exchange secret keepers of course." He had obviously realised he was sitting on the floor and pushed himself to his feet so he was eye level with Prongs. "It can't be me any more," he stated. "I'm sorry. I ruined it."

"Padfoot…"

"No! Listen to me. For once I'm serious."

"You're always Si-" James began cheerfully but the other cut him off. "The Death Eaters are after me, they must have suspected you'd choose me even over Dumbledore and then the mirrors…" he broke off, apparently disgusted with himself. "It's too late for me just to lie low any more."

"So you mean Remus…" The werewolf's lonely call echoed into the clearing.

"I don't. Moony's been going off on his own a lot… well more than usual."

" _Sirius_." James' tone was half reprimanding, half amused. "You think  _Remus_ is the spy?"

"It doesn't matter…"

"Then who…"

"It's the perfect plan. Think like Voldemort. Who's James Potter most likely to choose as his secret keeper?"

"…His best friend."

"Precisely and that's who you did choose but it was the wrong choice, the obvious choice."

James opened his mouth to speak but the other shook his head. "Carrying on with this logic if you didn't choose Sirius Black, the most irresponsible human being alive, you'd be sure to choose Remus Lupin or Albus Dumbledore. Voldemort would never dream you'd choose the  _fourth_  Marauder."

"Sirius…"

"It makes sense James," Padfoot replied. "Wormtail keeps your secret and I'll lead them as far away from you, Lily and Harry as I can."

James smiled but his eyes did not. "So we both get what we want, eh?"

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well you made it no secret you hated hiding from Voldemort," he replied coldly.

"I'm not sure I understand," Padfoot lied.

"The Great Sirius Black  _hide_? Of course not. No, he'd rather be out there winning glory and fighting battles that are not his own."

"I can't believe you think that."

"Then you think I'm too stupid to work it out, is that it?"

"Stop being a git Prongs, I'm trying to help you," he snarled.

"But only as long as it doesn't put you out in any way. Well thanks a lot but I don't need that kind of help!"

"I'm doing this for you!" Sirius yelled angrily "Perhaps if you weren't so bloody arrogant you'd accept that. I'll just wait around till the next century for that shall I?"

_Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo_

"Just forget it!" James screamed over the howl. "I should have remembered the only person Sirius Black cares about is Sirius Black!"

"Well now that's settled why don't we just do this and I'll be on my way."

James' eyes shone his face furious and scared. "Because I don't want you to die!"

"Hello?" a tentative voice interupted.

Both of them whirled. Peter Pettigrew cowered under the ferocity of their gazes, "you said you wanted to see me Sirius."

"Yes. We're swapping places."

"What?"

"Padfoot no…"

"It's too late James; I've made my choice." He opened his mouth again as if in speech but no audible words penetrated the silence of the clearing; instead a faint golden glow surrounded him eventually forming into a ball the size of a snitch in the palm of his hand. Gently Sirius released it and it floated towards James, who held out his to receive it, though unwillingly. The same glow enveloped him for a moment and then died once more.

"Alright Peter, hold out your hand… no the other way up." Sirius' voice was hoarse in the darkness, the tear trails down his face hidden. The moon had disappeared behind the clouds [thus their code for the Shrieking Shack] and the werewolf had finally grown quiet.

"Sirius, I'm not sure I can do this…"

"It's not difficult," the other snapped. "All you need to do is speak the secret out loud, the rest of the charm has already been set up."

James remained quiet, concentrating on keeping the secret within his body.

"So all I need to do is…"

"…Speak the secret Wormtail."

"And to end it, I just speak it again?"

"Why… would you… want to… end it?" James asked, flashing faintly as with each word the secret escaped him for a moment.

"Sirius did."

"Yes. That's how you end it," Sirius growled.

"So what's the secret?"

"I solemnly swear…" the gold mist around James became more apparent and seemed ready to leap back into Sirius. "Write it… down… moron," Prongs hissed desperately.

"Brought paper have you?" Sirius retorted. Wormtail cowered.

"…Wizard…" James croaked.

Sirius muttered something and then " _lumos._ Here." He thrust the small slip of paper into Pettigrew's trembling fist.

Visible by the light of his wand the wet ink shone:  _I solemnly swear I am doing what's right._


	3. Ending

Peter made some excuse and vanished back into the night.

"Prongs, I…"

"I have to go too, Padfoot. My family needs me."

He nodded in silent agreement,  _I know._

"Just don't die out there OK? I'll never speak to you again."

Sirius tried a weak grin. "And that would be a bad thing because…"

"Promise me."

"Alright…"

"Promise me you won't throw your life away… Shake on it." The hand in front of Sirius quivered gently and he grasped it firmly between his own. "I promise."

James embraced him quickly. "Get out of here then." He too tried a shaky grin. "Give Lucius Malfoy a good kick for me."

"James, I'm not leaving you!"

"Lily, take Harry and go! It's Him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off – "

Another look at her husband's face, pale but determined and Lily ran to the crib and gathered her infant son into her arms. Her hand was on the doorknob before she turned again.

James smiled briefly; one hand ran over his hair so it stuck up at the back.  _I love you_ , he mouthed.

The door slammed behind her as she stumbled out of the room and he turned back to the front door just in time to see it burst open.

"James Potter." The voice was calm, even amiable as it hissed "we meet again."

Somehow that same calm seemed to have descended over him and James was able to reply steadily. "For the last time Riddle."

Voldemort scowled slightly at the use of his former name but then smiled again, the same serpent smile. "You are correct. Twice before my hand has extended in friendship, twice it has been met with rebuke." Steely eyes flickered around the room before returning to the younger man's face. "There is no Dumbledore here to save you this time boy. There is no choice between good and evil; there is simply the choice between life and death." He held out his hand, long pale fingers, inviting. For a moment James hand moved towards the other.  _All you have to do is take it._

It was so simple. Why wasn't he moving?

 _Because this isn't right._ _This is_ Voldemort _._

"Never!" he spat.

"You leave me no choice then. Such a pity," the long fingers raised the wand that had taken the lives of so many before him. "I hate destroying talent."

"Crucio!" James screamed, knowing the curse was Unforgivable but not caring.

But Voldemort was ready for him.

Upstairs Lily fumbled with the fireplace. "Light!" she yelled at it furiously. "Light, damn you!  _Adurat_ _! Adurat!_  " Harry started to scream once more. " _Shhhh_  Harry, please." But the baby did not understand or did not care and kept wailing.

"Accio Floo Powder." The small pot flew to her hand and Lily gathered up her small son in her arms.

Through the floorboards came the terrible sound of her husband's yell.

" _Crucio_!"

His voice full of anger, despair and the knowledge he was about to die.

"No," she whispered, knowing it was no use. Harry had now stopped balling and was now whimpering in her arms. She dropped the pot of Floo Powder and started back to the door.

"James…"

But as she reached for the handle it moved in her hand.

"Miss Evans."

" _Mrs_ _Potter_ ," she corrected backing away.

"I did not think I would be the one to tell you." His face twisted into a hideous mockery of sympathy. "My dear you must know by now."

_I love you._

_I won't cry._ She tasted salt on her lips.  _Not now. Not in front of him._

_James…_

More tears trickled down her face to join the fast forming pool at her chin. Now she was crying without restraint.

_I love you._

Drops fell onto Harry's head and he started to wail once more.

"And here we have the star of this litttle show."

Despite everything Dumbledore had told her Lily still gasped as Voldemort's red eyes turned onto her son, as she saw the ravenous hunger reflecting in their depths.

"Not Harry! Not Harry! Please – I'll do anything - "

"Stand aside – stand aside, girl - " He was pulling his wand for his robes, the end moved towards Harry's head.

_Not Harry._

The Floo Powder was still in her hand, if she could just make it to the fireplace…

But she knew she wouldn't be able too. Still sobbing quietly she bent over her child, kissed the downy top of his head.

_I love you._

_"Avada - "_

"No!" She twisted quickly, shielding Harry from the Dark Lord's fury.

_" -_ _Kedavra!"_

_I love you James._

The Death Eater fell to the floor under the light of his curse. Grimacing Sirius walked forward and pulled the mask from the unconscious man's face. Robert Abby: one of the least talented wizards in his year.

It was actually insulting. He was supposed to be the Potter's Secret Keeper for Merlin's sake. Was  _this_  the best Voldemort could be bothered to send after him? Unless…

They knew there'd been a switch.

The owl fluttered onto his windowsill and Sirius ripped the paper from its leg, impatiently. The only two words were almost smudged beyond recognition.

The note fluttered onto the tiles as Sirius ran from the room.

_He knows._

The motorbike screeched to a stop and Sirius half dismounted half fell off it. The Potter's house was now a pile of rubble in the middle of the quietly suburban street that had noticed nothing.

"No!" someone yelled wretchedly. "No!"

This time Sirius recognised his own voice. "James?!" he cried falling over the broken bricks as he ran.

There was no answer. "Lily?!" His voice cracked as he screamed brokenly for the woman who would never reply. "James, answer me!"

The once gleaming door hung limply from its hinges.

 _I made it myself,_ Prongs told him proudly _._

_Liar._ _You never so much as managed a decent set of bookends in Muggle Studies and you know it._

_Well I might have had a little help, I admit…_

The shiny red paint that James had lovingly applied flaked away in his hands as if the house had been abandoned for decades rather than minutes, hours. "James?!" he screamed again. The door came away in his hands landing with a thump among the dust and debris and Sirius peered into the gloom with difficulty.

His heart stopped.

James Potter lay in front of the fireplace, his hair grey with grime, his limbs spread-eagled across their cheap carpet.

For a moment Sirius just stood there, staring at the body that had been his best friend then with an anguished sob he fell to his knees beside James, clouds of dust enveloping them both.

"Prongs…wake up… please." He tugged pathetically on the corner of James robes as if perhaps the dead man was just pretending and would wake up, beam heartily at him and inform him it was all a joke and hadn't he been a fool to believe it all. "I'll never speak to you again, remember?" Sirius told him desperately. But Prongs would never reply. Crying unashamedly he cradled his best friend in his arms, the same rough embrace as the night he had switched with Peter.

_This is all my fault._

Prongs still smelt the same: the same aroma of expensive after shave that Lily had hated, Harry's baby powder and the wild moors from where he had slipped away from his wife in the night and gone hunting with the Marauders.

_Give Lucius Malfoy a good kick for me._

"Don't worry I will," he muttered into his friend's hair.

"Lily?" A voice bellowed outside as Sirius clutched James' body to him closer, shielding him from the intruder. "James?"

 _I'll be back._  Quickly he removed his cloak and covered his friend with it so he wouldn't have to look at the wide staring eyes that no longer sparkled. Carefully, he picked his way out of the house and found the giant examining his motorbike. "Hagrid?"

"Sirius?" He started towards the trembling youth and Sirius stepped involuntarily back from him. "What 'appened? Where's Lily an' James?"

He pointed back into the ruins. "They're…" he stopped and shook his head trying to clear it. "I don't know what happened."

"Harry's still in there," Hagrid said, moving towards the house but Sirius shook his head again, mistaking it for a question. "You don' understand. Dumbledore told me ter come an' get 'im. He's still alive."

It took a moment for the news to sink in. "I'm not…" he stopped, turned pleading eyes onto Hagrid. "I  _can't_  go back in there."

"Stay 'ere then," the other advised striding into the ruin. "Watch out 'ncase the Death Eaters come back."

Sirius moved as far away from the house as he could, leaning on the motorbike for support. The Death Eaters. There was something he was supposed to remember.  _What was it?_

He looked back to the house and then turned away as his vision clouded once more.

_Promise me you won't throw your life away… Shake on it._

_I promise._

After a while Hagrid reappeared, this time he too was shaking, beetle black eyes shining in the street lamps. "Got 'im."

"Give him to me Hagrid," Sirius managed. "I'm his Godfather. I'll look after him."

But Hagrid would not relinquish the child. "I can't Sirius. Got orders from Dumbledore 'imself."

Sirius argued for a while and then a thought struck him. "How did you know to come here?"

"Litle Peter Pettigrew turned up about midnight. Tol' Dumbledore 'e was worried somethink had 'appened to Lily an' James. O course Dumbledore 'ad already suspected somethink was up and sent me out 'ere to get Harry."

"Pettigrew?"

"Yer."

"How'd he know?"  _How did Voldemort get to James if Peter's still alive?_ Hagrid was saying something but Sirius wasn't listening.  _It was impossible unless_   _Peter had betrayed them._  "No," he breathed.

"Look I've gotta take 'im Sirius. You can come an' see 'im in the holidays or summat."

It had never been Remus, he realised grief stricken.

It had been Peter all the time.

 _Peter_  was the Death Eater.

He had wanted to know how to end the Fidelus charm.

_And I told him how._

Sirius looked back at James' son, lying peacefully in Hagrid's arms. For a moment he wanted to seize this remnant of his best friend from the giant no matter what objection's Hagrid or even Albus Dumbledore raised. He leaned forward and stroked the hair away from Harry's face revealing Lily's eyes. The baby grabbed the outstretched finger and Sirius smiled slightly. Let Hagrid take him to Dumbledore. There was no reason that Harry couldn't live with him after the headmaster had seen he was safe and sound.

Except Dumbledore knew, or thought he knew, that Sirius had been the Potter's Secret Keeper. He knew nothing of the switch. Nobody did.

"Are you alright?" Hagrid asked, tentatively.

The only way he could prove what had happened would be to find Peter and force him to drink Veritaserum, to confess.  _Or you could,_  a small voice argued but he squashed it.

_Nobody listens to the ravings of a murderer._

Bending, he removed his finger from his Godson's mouth and kissed him gently on the forehead. "Take him to Dumbledore," he told Hagrid lifelessly. "Take my motorbike." He stole one last look back at the house, which had finally broken the Marauders. "I won't need it anymore."

_"Sirius I want to ask you something."_

_"Alright."_

_"Don't laugh."_

_Sirius grinned. "I won't."_

_"Liar."_

_"What can I say, I guess your bad influence has rubbed off on me."_

_James took a deep breath. "Will you be my Secret Keeper? Mine and Lily's?"_

_He laughed loudly, then louder still at James' expression. "I'd have been hurt if you asked anyone else."_

_Prongs enveloped him in a tight hug before breaking away, obviously embarrassed. "Thank you Padfoot. I knew I could count on you."_


End file.
